"Did you just have your baby?"

I had quite an eventful and busy day, compared to my life lately...

I had a dentist appt, an optometrist appt, and a chiropractic appt. Luckily Hubs was able to pack me around like the invalid that I am.

It is the longest I have been out of the house for two months.

First I will regale you with my dentist story...
I needed one tooth filled (A miracle folks, cause I was pretty certain I would have about 50 cavities and a root canal) and needed to get my teeth clean (can I get a hallelujah? Who doesn't like their teeth cleaned?). A few interesting things happened while at the dentist to Hubs and I.

First I will start with Hubs. He waited in the waiting room for me, and while in there got to listen IN DETAIL to a man confess to his spouse about his torrid affair... Did I mention she made him tell her exact IN DEPTH details? Yep... It's true.... Sadly.

Second, it's been awhile since I had my teeth cleaned... Um like 8 years (shame I know, but I have a deep fear of dentists since my last experience). I had forgotten the strangeness of getting your teeth cleaned. My question is this: If the Dentist, AND the hygienist get protective eye wear, how come the patient doesn't? Cause I'm pretty sure I don't want my own spit in my eye. Just saying. Also, if you can see I have a gigantic canker sore in my mouth, please do not insist on using the sucker machine only on that spot in my mouth. It hurts real bad. And it's actually not real funny turns out.

Third and last dentist story: Once the dentist finished up, and the hygienist is "polishing" my teeth (fancy word for brushing them real hard and halfheartedly) She says to me: "Did you just have your baby?" Um... no, I'm due in June. "Oh so your just like 6 weeks pregnant then?" Um... no I'm 25 weeks pregnant. "Oh, well are you sure?" Yep. Pretty sure. "Well, you don't look like you're pregnant... You just look like you have the post baby flub." Ok? Thanks? I think?

Also, why do they insist on asking you tons of questions, while you have all the instruments in your mouth, and then get upset at you when you answer?

Next up: The Optometrist. I am blind in one eye. Perfect vision in my other eye. Strange I know, another special thing I here about often. As a child I had one coke bottle lens and one plain plastic lens. In high school I graduated to contact. Not contacts, contact. Obviously in my blind eye. So I got some new glasses (which I haven't wore since I was about 12). Well turns out my blind eye has gotten worse by 4 steps, and has developed a pretty severe astigmatism; while my other eye has somehow maintained perfect vision (it's amazing I know). So now my glasses are even more special than before. Anyway, moral of the story is, I went to pick my glasses up and adjusted. Well the man asked me which side I thought was lower, so I tell him. He shouts at me and says (no lie) "Wrong!" Yep. Well sir, why did you ask me then? He continues to adjust my glasses and then tells me like I am a five year old wearing my first pair of glasses how careful I need to be, and to not attempt to adjust them myself. Ok? Pretty sure I am smart enough to figure that one out all by myself thanks!

Chiropractor: I have been seeing a really great chiropractor, that specializes in pregnancy, and bed rest. Which is right up my alley :) But since I don't move much my muscles get really tight and don't allow for an easy adjustment. And because of the way I have to lay and the long periods of time I am down, the adjustments are pretty intense every time I go. Twice a week. He said I should go three times. A week. That is the havoc I am currently reeking on my body by doing absolutely nothing. In order to do the adjustment, he has to do some incredibly deep tissue massage. With this tool that is my enemy. It is incredible pain, and then my back labor kicks in. It is horrible. Probably some of the most intense pain I have EVER experienced. And I am not exaggerating. The adjustment hurts so good, but the deep tissue part, horrible. And it hurts for at least two days after. Good thing I am already confined to bed, because I am fairly certain I would end up there anyway lol.

Pretty sure I'm gonna go ice my back now :)